How are we being the standard we want in our lives?

‘The standard we walk past is the standard we accept’

The quote comes from Australian Lt General Morrison in criticism of aggression against women. It was also adopted by the Fijian Sevens team in 2016 when they won the country’s first ever Olympic gold medal.

Much has been written about it in the context of leadership and performance and the importance of maintaining standards and calling out behaviours that aren’t otherwise in keeping with values and mission in pursuit of our goals. At its heart it is about accountability to what we deem important, to upholding standards that are essential to success, however we define it.

The quote also begs the question, what is our standard? And how are we modelling that standard? 

In modelling it, how are we showing the possible alternative to what we’re calling out?

Yes, not walking past a standard is crucial and difficult but also only something we can influence. What we can fully control is the standard we set ourselves and the extent we uphold that. 

In other words, wow are we being proactive as well as reactive in creating what we want to see and be in the world?

If we take a radical view, the only change we can effect is in us, how we are, what we do, how we do what we do.

Therefore what is the standard for the life we want to live, for the world we want to create? 

What is the standard we want to live by?

What comes up when thinking about these questions?

Regardless of how life goes, what is the standard we would have to live by to be content with ourselves?

How are we living up to the standard that matters for us?

How does that compare to the standard that we are currently living?

What is the impact of that standard on our lives?

How does the standard we’re living contribute to the life we want to live and the world we want to contribute to?

What could living by that standard look like?

Being clear on the standard that matters for us allows us to think about how we can live by it and model it.

Similar to values, standards can be abstract, so living by and defining the standards is a mixture of reflection and experimentation. Crucial to this is an ongoing process of seeing what we do that feels in keeping with the standard we want to maintain and also considering if that standard is the standard we want based on what our actions are achieving.

So what would living by our standard look like each day? 

How can we create more of what we want in the world by being our standards? 

There is the reactive aspect of creating what we want by calling out standards we don't want to accept. However, we can also act to create what we want in our world. 

For example, in a recent programme I facilitated, the co-lead encouraged us to model what we want to teach by thinking about how we present material, how we respond to questions and, if we want to encourage openness in the group, how are we and can we be open?

So thinking about what you’d like to see more of in your life, from your friends or colleagues, what are you doing to model what you want? 

For example, if we want a greater sense of connection, in what ways are we modelling the connection we want? 

In short, how can I be more of the things that matter to me in life? How can we be the bridge from what is to what we’d like to be and see more of in the world?

Being clear on what we want to move away from is only half the picture, being clear on what we want to be, showing the standard we want to move towards completes the picture, not just for us but for others. 

What would the world be like if we all were the role models for the world we want to create?